"Where Are You?"

Last month, there was a lot of changes in Zoe's life. My father, Zoe's care-taker was hospitalised due to liver cancer. My father was unconscious for a week and doctor has adviced us to prepare ourselves. But, thank God, who has shown me miracle can happened in every day life by answering our prayer and brought back Dad for us. My father is still weak but at least he's home with us now.

It has been difficult for the whole family and we never thought that it was harder to the little girl. Zoe seems to understand that Gong Gong is very ill and has to be in the hospital but she was unable to express her worried, anxiety and lack sense of security. We have tried to kept her close to us and we even brought her to the hospital to see Gong Gong. At first, Zoe was really uncomfortable to see Gong Gong with all tubes and cried each time she see Gong Gong. We thought that the little girl understand after we have explained to her on Gong Gong condition but I don't think she does and therefore Zoe is always in tears. Frequently, Zoe will ask her care-taker "Where's Gong Gong, Where's Mummy.....and so forth.

My friends did advised me to spend more time with Zoe - bringing her out for some outing and find activities that can do together. However, until now, Zoe is not quite settle and will not let me out of her sight everytime I worked from home.

I hope that Zoe could gain back her sense of security and won't affect her growing up.

Potty Training - Successful!

We have been encouraging Zoe in her potty training on and off. Whenever Zoe become cranky, we will stop for fear that Zoe will have phobia in the future.
For the past 2 weeks, we have been encouraging Zoe to pee in the toilet and finally yesterday she's diaper free!!. However, squatting in the wet toilet may be hazardous for the little girl, therefore today we dug back the potty to let her try again on potty. And surprisingly, Zoe pee in the potty the whole day.

Potty training proved to be challenging for me especially a working mum who only has some time in the morning and at night to spend with Zoe. It need a lot of patience and and encouragement for both the child and mum. I guess I have been rushing into giving Zoe potty training at an early age. At that time, Zoe has just learned to talk, therefore getting her to potty has gone too much for the little girl.

Zoe's 1st Trip to Port Dickson

We should have brought Zoe to the beach side earlier but when Zoe were younger, she's always down with flu, that's why we delayed our plans. Since this is a short trip, we did not have any reservation until 3 days before the trip but regretted as accommodation such as Avillion and Legend Water Homes were fully booked. Anyway, we're fine with Bayu Beach Resort as it's near to the Food court and the town.

After a good rest, we brought Zoe down to the beach side. We were expecting the little girl will be afraid of the big pool of water but to our surprise it's not the water but the sand. Zoe was reluctant to walk on the sand because it's dirty! (yes we have a clean freak here) and I have to carried her all the way to the water!


After breakfast, we decided to let Zoe played awhile on the beachside. Zoe enjoyed being in the water and loved the wave but not when the sand covered her leg. We have no choice but to change venue to the swimming pool where Zoe played the whole morning.

It's a short trip but it's fun to have some outdoor activities. Hope the next time when we visit the beach side, I don't nee to carry Zoe all the way.

Bonding with Zoe

For the past 2 years, I've been working to improve bonding with Zoe. I must say this does not come naturally as I've expected. Zoe is an active child and can't sit still even for a minute, how to bond? :(

Therefore, at 16 months I enrolled Zoe for a music programme that promote bonding between child and parents. In the beginning, I felt envy towards other mothers in the class when their children were so attentive. It's only the second months that I saw some progress with Zoe. Finally she allowed me to rock her, a way to calm her and of course to create bong between us.


Now at 2 years, Zoe and I are used to the 'bonding class'( what I called it) and able to enjoy ourselves more. I can see that Zoe starts to follow the acitivities in class. I've learned that bonding with child is a long term process and as parents we need to maintain the bonding all the time.

There are a lot of support that we could make use to close the gap between mother and child.

Growing Up with Zoe

At 20 months, Zoe started to express herself and consistently showed us what she likes or dislikes. This is when we realized that the little girl likes her fishball meehoon and ABC soup with rice! She can have these 2 dishes every meal! Added to this, Zoe was excited to have her chips and cashew nuts for snacks and not forgetting bread and butter for breakfast.

Eventually, she still dislikes vegetable and beans. Till now, we’re still looking for a way to get Zoe to finish her vege.

Zoe is going to be 2 next month. As I’m being told, Zoe is going into a difficult stage but is a normal transition to grow up. I had a few ‘sneak preview’ where the little girl is pushing to the limit (my patient) and one if it was getting her to sleep. Zoe had requested bottle of water before settling down. While drinking, she would accidentally spilled some water out and wet her pajamas, just to get it changed, to get our attention and to be certain the adults around her know important she is. Phew! What’s more?

My father was helping me to babysit Zoe while waiting for the maid’s arrival. Because of this, Zoe is strongly attached to her Gong Gong. She would not go to bed unless Gong Gong is putting her to sleep…now you can imagine the hard time I have putting the little to sleep. We realized that for the past months, both my husband and me were quite tied up with projects at work and we were unable to put Zoe to bed every night.

The attachment was so strong with Gong Gong and the little girl only felt secured in Gong Gong room and reluctant to sleep in our bedroom. We’re aware that we have to assured the little girl that we won’t leave her and to build the trust again.

Happy Birthday to You, Mummy!

My wish this year is very simple...more time for the family especially Zoe. After watching her birthday video, Zoe more or less understand what is birthday celebration, song and cake. So, today when she saw the birthday cake, Zoe was very excited and insisted on going near to have a better glance. Yes, we had a hard time getting her away from the cake!

On the way back from dinner, we sang along Happy Birthday and suddenly Zoe wished me 'Happy Birthday to you, Mummy!' I'm so touched and this is the best birthday gift I received. Look forward for more birthdays to come :)

Emotional Bagage

I was told to beware of toddler sensitivity but I never guess I have to face it at this early stage. At 20 months Zoe understand our conversation. Of course, we under estimated the little girl ability to understand it. Actually, we suspected that when my brother in-law placed her daughter with my mother in-law, Zoe became jealous as my mother in-law is taking care of the little baby. Regret to say that I don't what is the level that Zoe was left alone but we're trying to make Zoe to understand the whole situation.

Another incident, when Mum friends try to coax Zoe to follow them by saying Gong Gong does not want her anyway, Zoe started to cry instantly and kept holding to Gong Gong and never want to let go. Just now, before she fall asleep, she needs Gong Gong assurance that Daddy, Mummy, Gong Gong and Po Po wants her.

From all the incidents we realised that our little girl is sensitive and even at this early stage she actually understand her surrounding. It's now that we need to spend more time with Zoe talking to her and ensure that she realise that we love her.

Happy Chinese New Year 2010

X'mas, Brother's Wedding, Bali Trip and now CNY all in 2 months. Well, I think I need time to update all the events for Zoe.

Besides all this, HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR TO ALL...!

What a good 2nd CNY with Zoe. Last year Zoe was still a little baby trying to figure out the fuzz of CNY and curious on the red packets she's getting.

This year Zoe understand CNY is a celebration and excited about the fuzz started to enjoy on the preparation with CNY songs, biscuits and 'ang pow'. Zoe accepted that she needs to say Gong Xi; Gong Xi to get ang pow.(Haha...actually she enjoyed the gesture of Gong Xi Gong XI than the ang pow). All the excitement made the little girl exhausted and is sleeping well now. Good nite, Zoe!